Before Walt Disney World planning websites existed, most people had to rely on guidebooks or Disney-savvy friends to help them plan the tiny details of their trip.
Most of the tips that frequent park-goers now take for granted were once a nightmare for helpless first-timers. The Disney guides have been around for decades, but there are still those moments in Walt Disney World that even Birnbaum couldn’t prepare you for.
If your personal belongings would’ve been enchanted (like inside Beast’s castle) they totally could’ve warned you about these horrendous first trip situations:
- Breaking-in brand new shoes at the parks – If your feet had told you their opinion, they wouldn’t have had very nice things to say about those new, adorable wedge sandals or stylish Nikes with Mickey Mouse laces. Your immature shoes then initiated a fight with your feet for talking smack. Remember when you got off Splash Mountain and the blisters began? …And that was only after 10:00 a.m. on day one.
- Taking pictures on dark rides – Your camera was so embarrassed to be flashing its lights and blinding the other Guests in the boat. Your camcorder was absolutely terrified, even while wearing its Velcro safety strap around your hand as your limo went from 0-60mph in 2.8 seconds. They wished you would’ve dropped them off at Lost and Found, but that’s just not how it works.
- Wearing jeans in the summer – They pleaded with you, “Don’t bring me!” but you packed them anyway, because they give you curves in all the right places (for Mickey Mouse to see, of course). Your poor Levi’s ultra-skinny denims were like a built in sauna during those 100% humidity, ninety degree days, but Mickey thought you looked good (which is all that mattered, right?). It’s not just Walt Disney World in the summer…it’s Orlando, let’s not forget.
- Not using sunscreen – Your Coppertone lotion was offended that you didn’t apply it, but it was an overcast day, so it wasn’t needed. That was the day you went to Blizzard Beach and the waterslides all taunted you, calling you “Sunburnt Santa.”
- Not bringing snacks – Remember when you decided to just wing-it with your family? Your wallet excitedly stated, “If you’re hungry, just use me to buy a snack!” Four ice cream cones (two on the ground), twenty-five dollars and thirty minutes later, your kids crankily claimed, “We’re hungry again. When’s lunch?”
- Neglecting to make reservations – It was Day 3 of your WDW trip, and you woke up with the bright idea that you’d take the kids, Grandma, and Uncle Joe to eat breakfast at Cinderella’s Royal Table. Reservations? What are those? Everyone should get to meet the princesses! Your sunglasses were glad they could hide at least some of your shocked expression when the Cast Member at the podium told you there were no available walk-ins for your party of seven.
- Letting that happy, singing family cut you in line – You thought it was the Good Samaritan thing to do by letting that nice family with the matching neon t-shirts go ahead of you at Toy Story Midway Mania. And did you see that cute little flag they were carrying? Adorable! Your watch began to cry the seconds away as more and more neon shirts cut in front of you and the rest of their seventy-five person “family” joined them.
- Not picking up a Times Guide – “Don’t forget me!” it yelled as you walked away with its partner in crime, the Park Map. “What are all these people lining up for?” you wondered as 3:00pm approached. The Walt Disney World Times Guide is essential. You also had no idea where to find any characters, but figured Mickey would just run up and hug you on Main Street, right? At least that’s how the commercial goes…
- Forgetting where you parked your car – Your feet and its brand-new shoes (remember?) were even more upset with you when you jumped off the tram at Aladdin, but then remembered you’d parked at Ursula.
- Not taking an afternoon break – You had decided to begin with Animal Kingdom’s 8am Extra Magic Hour (EMH), and park hop all day through lunch until Chef Mickey’s for dinner, where you proceeded to fall asleep at the dinner table. Your pajamas were quite thrilled when you returned to the hotel room, where you slept through Wishes and Magic Kingdom’s late EMH, when most of the rides were walk-ons.
Have any of these Walt Disney World situations happened to you?
Happy to say that none of these happened to us and we had our first 2 visits starting 20 years ago, before all these web sites started popping up. It sure seemed more realized back then though.